i said it before we ate it and i'll say it after partially consuming and irritably digesting it. i hate Del-Taco! alright hate might be a bit strong, i know we were taught to never say it, but i really don't like it. except for the nacho cheese sauce. the melted fake cheese sauce was okay. but the "chicken" didn't look or taste like the kind of chicken i'm comfortable eating. this is why eating meat is usually a problem for me.
tonight was our second class towards our foster care license. it was very informative and more than i expected. mostly it consisted of learning a lot of the possible "scenarios" these children are in, the obstacles they typically face and what needs we would meet first as a foster parent. so much of fostering is about healing these children and their families. i understand that reunification with their biological families is always the goal. however, tonight i'd say out of all that we went over my eyes were opened to just how much of foster care is aimed towards rebuilding / mentoring the biological parents. my understanding prior to this was that foster parents had no contact with the biological parents of the children in their care. apparently it's quiet the opposite. they spoke of much more interaction than i had anticipated. of course each case is different and not all biological parents are in a place where they want interaction with the foster families.
our heart and plan is adoption but we will be foster parents first to the children we provide a forever family to and in so doing will most likely have a good amount of contact with the natural family. of course my instinctive reaction to that scenario is immediate discomfort and doubt in my ability but then that's why we do this one day at a time. thinking about what could be and imagining the uncomfortable and unfamiliar situations will always make me doubt my abilities. this is why i vowed tonight to only want to know enough information to educate me but not so much that will jade me. i'd like to go through this process with purity and good will intact. is that possible?