Saturday, June 15, 2013

backtracking



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becky, remember that one time you started a blog to document your life? yeah, get on that why don't-cha.

backtracking to may, the best month of the year {except for december because it holds christmas} best because it's always been best. may holds spring time, last days of school, dance recitals, warm evenings, bbq chicken and strawberry pies. also may holds my birthday and birthdays bring presents and presents make me feel all warm inside and loved and stuff. 

so wayyyy back on may 1st i was face timing with our honorary nieces in big tex {texas} when all of a sudden the little stinkers yelled out "auntie becky you're coming to texas!!" right on cue ben handed me an envelope that wished me a"happy b-day month" that gave me permission to hang around in my undies if i felt like it. also it had two tickets to fly far far away from here. 
i. was. pumped. i've missed my beloved texas and the people who are still in it. 


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immediately following our last foster licensing class off we went. like for real immediately, we were airport bound for one red eye to dallas. my bestie and sister-friend, you know like sister-wives but not, had just given birth to her second baby girl and i wanted to smother her with kisses and hugs.  

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ben pretty much hogged baby jewel the whole time and stole sweet josse's heart which left me in a predicament. i wasn't the favorite. i'm always the favorite over ben with the kiddos! how dare he. all josse wanted was "uncle bee-yan" and i was "whats that?" said while pointing straight at me over and over again. apparently i've gotten rusty. at least after spending an afternoon chasing "hops hops" {thats a bunny rabbit for you less informed} together outside for a while i could get her to even be interested that i too had a name and that she was fit to call me by it. who knew all it took was running around for 30 minutes in the humidity to get her to actually say "bee-key". kids. it was a trip in education. thank you josse for beginning to see that uncle ben has nothing on auntie becky. 

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gosh it was good to get away. not only to get away but to go where it felt like home. very few places have the privilege of feeling like home to me. home is a place that forever changed as i grew up and still does. i've moved well into my adult years and we're still not settled. each place never feeling like i can exhale. my parents house, my in-laws, my grand parents, and sherilynn's house are they only places i can literally feel my body and soul let out a deep exhale. it's funny how i didn't notice how tightly wound i was until i was sitting in her home feeling emotionally loosed. good friends and good homes are hard to come by these days. i am grateful. 

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we registered for baby stuff with sheri and i couldn't believe how fulfilling the experience was. since moving away from my closest friends i've been paranoid that as soon as we prepared to have kiddos of our own that i'd be on my own and not have those that i hold dear to my heart around to be involved in this process of my life. my reality couldn't be further from my fear. i am surrounded by such kind, loving and supportive friends right now. well all the time really, but when you're vulnerable and afraid the kindness of others seems all the more magnified doesn't it? kindness and support are magnified and shinning so brightly in my life right now and i'm so very grateful for it. 
i had my sweet sweet friend by my side to help me get a grasp on this whole mothering thing. all we were doing was clicking a scanner on some bar codes but the whole symbolism of that afternoon was earth shattering in my life. we were registering for baby stuff! we were, ben and i. ben and i and sherilynn were registering for items that we will need because we are going to be parents, and very soon too. ....how did we get here? oh the joy, hahaha i laugh in the face of yesterday when i could only dream of having a reason to register and now i've done it. i feel like yelling out i have registered for baby stuff  at the top of my lungs. who cares?! exactly, who cares! me me me. me cares very much!  

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macy and her parents, our very dear friends, met us for lunch one afternoon and that sweet baby and i had us a swell time. this little lady happens to be our goddaughter and we haven’t seen her since we moved away. crystal, macy’s mamma, told me they’ve had our christmas card on their fridge since december and macy won’t let em take it down. come to find out this doll thinks her auntie & uncle are pretty cute and says hi to our picture everyday. so from the minute she saw us in person we were stuck like glue. i tell ya, the way that baby looked at me and kept hugging me made my insides melt into mush. aww i want one. 

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seeing so many friends and little humans who belong to our friends was just so awesome. i loved it! every single minute of this trip, made me fall in love with my friends even more.

what a treat. thank you benny for surprising me with a get away trip to spend time with a few of my favorites. how incredibly thoughtful you are. i’m a blessed girl. muah! 



6 comments:

  1. So glad you could spend time with some of your favourite people for your birthday!

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  2. SheriLynn Couvdos AlcalaJune 26, 2013 at 1:57 PM

    LOVE YOU!!!!!! What a fun trip and boy do we miss yall even more now!!!! Josse asks about Uncle Bee-yan & Backy everyday ;)

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  3. Exciting times!! Just found your blog and I'm your newest follower.

    XO,

    Catherine

    FEST

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  4. Have loved your blog and would love an update -just a quick one. So curious how the foster parenting has gone.

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  5. I just wanted to let you know that I've been feeling pretty wacko lately --a little down, if you will. So for a pick-me-up, I have been re-watching all of your Thursday Latelies as I get ready for work each morning. And wow! How powerful you can be in such a short amount of time.


    Thank you so much for sharing your wonderful perspective on life and brightening my days. I hope all is blissful and lovely in your neck of the woods. And I cannot WAIT for an update. I feel as if I know you so well, in such a great way! You are so true to yourself. It's beyond inspirational. I truly hope your days of blogging are not over for good.


    Thanks again, Bex!


    xoxo Kadi

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  6. Long time reader / follower of yours.... I miss your blogging, but am so so happy for you and this path to motherhood ! Totally a coincidence with the comment below, but I have also been rewatching your Thursday Latelies videos too... They are so uplifting and have been helping me focus on being mindful. Hope all is well!

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